


The Sher-Loch Ness Monster

by MikeyTheGayOverlord



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: :), Anal Sex, Cock Piercing, Cock Vore, Eggpreg, I ruined it, I want to kill myself, I'm sorry fellow Sherlockians, It's literally monster porn, John Watson Swears a Lot, Literal Sea Monster Dicks, M/M, Mrs. Hudson Ships It, Non-Consensual Voyeurism, Non-con monster porn, OPE - Freeform, Other, Pheromones, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Put on your seatbelts kiddos, Sherlock Holmes and Experiments, Sherlock Holmes and John Watson Being Idiots, Tentacle Sex, Vore, Voyeurism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-29
Updated: 2019-12-26
Packaged: 2021-02-26 07:34:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,112
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21600031
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MikeyTheGayOverlord/pseuds/MikeyTheGayOverlord
Summary: I hate myself for writing this. But did I go through with it? Yes. Do I have other main stories that I should be updating? Yes. Did I have to contribute to the weird side of ao3? Of course.
Relationships: John Watson/Original Male Character(s), Sherlock Holmes/:), Sherlock Holmes/John Watson
Comments: 7
Kudos: 55





	1. Sher Don't Need No Safety Harness

**Author's Note:**

  * For [All y'all monster fuckers](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=All+y%27all+monster+fuckers).



> I ruined my friends innocence by writing this  
> No beta reader so ignore my spelling shit storm

"John, get me _DOWN!_ " 

John laughed, eyeing the monster's tank's control panel in the other room. "Why? He seems fond of you, Sherlock."

"I will have Mycroft destroy you and your family! He will erase your existence off the face of this _planet_."

"I told you-"

"Yes, I know what you _bloody_ told me. And I'm telling _you_ to get this beast to _put me down!"_

John shook his head at his friend suspended in the air by a genetically mutated squid. Sherlock had tried to climb down to collect a water sample. Then giant tentacles had shot out of the water, hoisting the tall, lean detective into the air, waving him like a flag. John was now tasked with finding something to get the creature to drop Sherlock.

"Find a stick!" The angry bean pole had shouted from his post out on the water.

Now, his shouts became more urgent. "John! _John! JOHN!_ Castrate it! It's crawling up my _LEG!"_

"Relax," John moved back to the glass section of the wall to chide his overreacting friend, "you're-"

Sherlock was not overreacting. The octopus-squid-monster-hybrid had all but split Sherlock's trousers down his right flank, exposing his side and ass to John. _I shouldn't get flushed at this._ John muttered to himself, moving quickly back to the control room. _He's vulnerable right now and he's going to be super grumpy after._

" _John!_ " Sherlock whined.

 _Sherlock whined._

There was one particularly large appendage around Sherlock's middle. His two legs were wrapped in sea monster arms. A slimy tentacle was cupped around the back of his head, squirming back and forth as if it couldn't get a grip on Sherlock's skull. And now a fifth arm was slinking around the one around Sherlock's stomach, pushing up and down on Sherlock's dick.

"Holy shit."

John hadn't even thought that he'd said it out loud, but it made Sherlock kick his legs. "John?"

Sherlock thrashed uncomfortably, the largest limb moving from around his middle to immobilize his arms. It was like being in a torture Rack, stretching Sherlock's already lanky body, but with tentacles. Like, a lot of tentacles. The arm that had been molesting Sherlock now wound just under his hips to his behind. "Too close! _Too close!"_

Sherlock thrashed even harder, kicking and pulling with his arms and legs. John whipped his head around, looking for any doctors that were supposed to be around here on base. Then John realized that he and his friend _shouldn't_ be on base. He was contemplating finding some personnel and risk blowing their cover when, _"Get the fuck out of me you slimy bastard!"_

Dr. Watson turned around to find a wet, slimy tentacle eagerly pushing it's way in-

_Oh, god._

John breathed out and stumbled backwards. He should be helping, not watching. The detective tried pushing up and away with his legs, but the monster pulled him down farther, forcing the nearly five-inches thick arm back into Sherlock's body. He let out a half-strangled scream, the tentacle wiggling back and forth, moving further up. Finally, the dark-haired man looked over, still straining against his tentacle bonds. 

"Johnnn?" He pleaded.

"I-I don't know what to do. I-"

The base of the tentacle arched upwards, simultaneously pushing into Sherlock's prostate, taint, and balls. This time, Sherlock arched with the arm, letting out a whiny pant and a soft string of rapid curse words.

John slid down the wall, panting as well. "Fucking bloody hell." 

The tentacle making its way into Sherlock's body shot even further inside. John could swear he could see the bulge of it bunching up and curling inside his friend's gut. The arm had to be six inches around, now. John palmed the tent in his trousers. The detective's body was now writhing and rocking along with the tentacles. His body was slick with sweat, water, and monster slime. Sherlock weakly kicked his trousers off into the water. John looked up and _oh._

John could just barely make out a shiny, silver barbell strung through Sherlock's pale pink tip. He'd somehow freed one of his hands from the thick rope around his wrists and began rubbing himself, thumbing the silver buds. His head would've fallen back if not for the sea monster tentacle pillow behind his neck.

"Oh, fuck," John muttered, undoing his button and shoving his hand down his front.

Sherlock looked over, eyes bleary, to see his sidekick rubbing at his cock in the viewing room hall. "Why don't you come join me, Doctor?"

Hand temporarily stilling, John looked up, slightly shocked. _Right, I should've been helping. Not-_

As he processed Sherlock's words, John's back straightened against the wall. _"Join me?"_

"You want me to-?"

"No, I wanted you to get me out of here. On the bright side," Sherlock reached down to finger the tentacle writhing happily in his ass, "I got some monster slime samples! I can test what's in the water and compare it to regular water."

It seemed like he was about to say more, but the water shifted. A massive, dark shape swam just below the surface. The creature's head breached the surface, sending small waves against the viewing glass and drenching Sherlock's tired body, who spluttered in new-found fury. The source of the tentacles made its ugly face known. And its dick.

You know how the unfortunate victims of tentacle fucking only get used by the arms? Well this guy has a dick, ten inches in diameter. Now, the human anus can stretch to eight inches. Given the fact that Sherlock knows this, from both 'experiments' and personal experience, he shouted, "John! Enough shitting around get me out of here!"

John quickly stood, his trousers sliding down his legs, tripping him. Looking up, he saw another face in the shadows. "Like what you see? Well, that's my friend out there and I'm the only one allowed to stare. How do we get it to stop?"

The guard shifted on his feet, uncomfortably. "W-well we were scheduled to send in Osiris's mate today. It seems that your friend has something on him that tricked Osiris to think that he's...his mate."

John got into the guard's face, intimidatingly so, even with his ass in the open air. "How do we stop it?"

"Y-you can't. H-he needs to breed."

"He needs to _what?"_ Sherlock screeched from the tank. Coming back around the corner, John and the guard found the detective hanging at an angle solely by his arms, two tentacles in his ass now.

"Breed."

"And what'll that do to a human?"

///John///

The guard shifted again with fear and arousal. "W-w-we don't know this has never happened I'm so sorry-" He rambled.

Having had enough of the young, nervous man, John made his way to the tank door to open it. "Wait, don't-!"

The guard lunged towards John a little too slow. A wave of pheromones hit John like a wall. He fell to his knees, coughing. The air smelt overwhelmingly like sweat, sea water, sex, and Sherlock. _And oh god it was tempting._

The guard lowered his arm, "That'll release the pheromones," he sighed.

The new, pungent smell made him hungry. It hardened his dick all over again, and it cried to be taken care of. He turned to the young man behind him, whose eyes went wide as he saw the look in John's eyes and the scent hit him. Both men moved forward at the same time, locking lips. It was clear that the scent coming from Sherlock and the sea monster had furiously turned John on. It didn't matter to him who the other person was, John was going to dominate them and _win._

He promptly pushed the guard to the floor, his last remaining sanity making him glance at the name badge. _Benedict._ And then his sanity was gone. John pulled at Benedict's shirt, popping off all of the buttons in one fluid motion. Targeting Benny's left nipple first, John leaned in and began to suckle and nip, hands moving firmly up the other man's thin sides. The guard immediately keened and arched up into the doctor's touch. John was usually a cool, collected man, but not right now. Right now, just two minutes in, he'd already pushed a finger inside this stranger's ass, their clothes completely off. _This is going to be fun._

///Sherlock///

Sherlock was getting very impatient. He was fine with this because it allowed him to be close to the monster and collect many different points of data. And besides, it's not like it didn't feel good at all. Sure it was a sea monster, but it was still better than most people Sherlock had to deal with undercover. John should've done something by now. Especially since the monster's head had emerged from the deep with a large, glistening member peeking curiously above the waves. He couldn't cross his arms, as they were once again the only thing holding him up, but he was mentally crossing them. Both of the tentacles that were currently very intimately placed stopped pistoning into his gut and wiggled down. Sherlock groaned at the suctioning _pop_ as they pulled out. The aforementioned tentacles wound back around his ankles, stretching his limbs out, and lowered the detective's body down towards the settling waves. The sea monster's cock was truly the monster around here. But alas, if John didn't figure something out soon, he'd just have to endure. Sherlock glanced up once more to the viewing hall to see the man from before be violently shoved face first into the glass. Sherlock tilted his head watching for the man's attacker, when John's head loomed over the man's naked body. _Ah..._

Sherlock shouldn't feel disappointed. John was merely a sidekick. A live-in acquaintance. He could fuck whomever he pleased. Sherlock groaned at the thought. And at the giant dong pressed wetly against his asshole. Slippery, leathery skin pressed against Sherlock's pale, slick skin. _I guess I'll just have to endure._

The dark-haired detective drew in his breath and bore down on the sea monster's dick as it pushed up. It was...alarming. All Sherlock could manage to shout was, "Oh _fuck_ , get it out! John!"

///John///

_God, this feels so fucking good._

John continued to expertly rock into the security guard's abnormally slim body, observing the gentle ripples in his ass as their skin collided. Something in the air changed. It went from sweet and enticing to fearful and tinged with iron. Sanity momentarily returned, John stared down at the man he was currently inside. It took his mind a moment to snap back, reminding him of their situation. Don't get him wrong, the warm body wrapped around his aching cock felt so nice and...

No. John shook his head. "Uh, sorry about this."

He awkwardly motioned to the guard's face against the glass and the incriminating placement of certain body parts. "You smelt it too?"

John stared blankly, again.

"The blood?" Benedict reminded him, ass still curved in the air.

_Blood... The blood? Why- Oh shit._

"Oh, shit. I'm just gonna-"

John awkwardly pulled his dick out of Benedict's body. "Yep."

Looking intently out the window, John found his friend being impaled on a sea monster's giant cock. "That can't be comfortable."

Sherlock finally looked up, jaw tense and limbs strained. "It's really not." 

Benedict got up from the floor. "I'm not quite a security guard." He fiddled with his thumb.

"Pray, tell!" Sherlock retorted from the tank, being painfully filled with even more force than the monster had been thrusting with before.

"I'm supposed to help if something like this happens."


	2. Bene-dicked Down

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm a dumbass and kept posting this to the wrong story

"I'm supposed to help if something like this happens."

John stared, still somewhat in a daze. 

"So, are you going to replace me or what?" Sherlock urged from the tank.

Benedict stirred. "Oh, yeah. I just have to get the pheromones." 

Sherlock cried out as the sea monster shoved particularly hard inside his body. "J-just make sure John gets out of the way. He seems particular to the smell and he might... go after you, again." 

Benedict came back out with a spray bottle full of pink liquid. "John, go inside the lab."

"But-"

"Go, John. I don't want you or your friend getting hurt. Let me go take his place."

John slinked off into the lab and closed the door. The air was cooler and clearer in there. With a single, deep inhale, John was able to focus on the fact that he'd just ravished some stranger and almost left his friend to die at the arms of some sea monster. He rolled onto his back and hid his face in his strong hands. "Ohhh, god."

The door burst in, revealing a shivering wet man. John's favorite grumpy, dark-haired, lanky detective. Who still smells really good.

Sherlock crouched and pressed a finger to John's forehead. "No. Absolutely not."

Benedict let out a sharp yelp from inside the tank. The duo faced each other, then jumped up to the viewing window. Since the monster had already commenced the mating process with Sherlock and since Benedict had not been so readily prepared, the two could already see blood being churned through the water. Benedict had barely been in the tank for more than two minutes when they saw it. A round bulb making its way just under the slimy tentacle's surface. Benedict must have seen it too, because he started to groan and sob.

"Any chance you'll stay for one more round?" He tiredly shouted to Sherlock.

"I can-"

The bulb found a burst of speed, just reaching the spot were the sea monster was now molded into Benedict. He let out one more loud sob and stretched back into the tentacles restraining his limbs. The egg made its journey from the sea monster to Benedict's gut. He curled in on himself and the cantaloupe sized egg that both John and Sherlock could see heavily deposited in his intestines. The two detectives watched as the monster hastily deposited three more eggs. It roared upon gifting the last egg and set Benedict's almost completely limp body on the stairs near the elevated door. With one last wave of Osiris's slimy arms, he bubbled under the dark surface. The water stilled. Sherlock was the first one to jump into action, swinging the door wide open. Watery, oozy slime and blood trickled out of Benedict's mouth and ass. He groaned.

"Is it over? Are you okay?"

The door was pushed back once more by John, panting. "What kind of question is that? You- you both just got absolutely gutted by some genetically fucked squid!"

Benedict chuckled, which sounded more like a cough, and rolled onto his back. "I thought they were joking when they said that this might happen. Usually it's because a doctor stayed in the tank too long around mating time. Who are you guys anyway?" 

John looked up into Sherlock's calm eyes with uncertainty. "Inspectors. There were other reports of... unfortunate mating."

Benedict squinted, nodded tiredly as if that's what he'd expected, and passed out on the metal grate stairs. Sherlock and John shared another look and hoisted Benedict's now pregnant body off of the cold metal. Together they found towels to wrap the sort-of security guard in. In John's medical opinion, other than the fact that Benny was now the technical carrier to four really fucking weird squid monsters, he was fine and just needed rest. In his moral opinion, they needed to bring Benedict with to get him help. But Sherlock convinced him that it'd be a lot more suspicious if they were carrying a body out the door than if they left him there with some water and towels. It was his job, anyhow. By either the grace of god or Mycroft, the two made it out of the research center hell scape. Not ready to face Henry Knight just then, John suggested finding a hostel for at least the night before returning to their investigation. 

////

"It's a shame, really. He was a nice man."

Sherlock face planted onto the light grey comforter on the bed. "I don't want to hear of your conquests, John. Besides, sea monster beats security guard."

John let out a snort that quickly turned into full-blown laughter. Sherlock watched him roll on the bed with mild amusement. "So what did you get into that made the monster go off?" John finally settled down.

Now that was a twinkle of mischief. A cocky eyebrow lifted just before Sherlock sprang from the bed to rifle through his bag. John studied the tall, slim man as he muttered to himself, pushing a shirt aside. "Aaaand..."

Sherlock held it up as if it wasn't illegal.

"You... you stole the pheromone bottle? Are you mad?"

He giggled. If John had been any more loopy, he would have sworn that he just hallucinated Sherlock Holmes giggle. A grin broke out across John's now less-tired face.

"You're mad. You're absolutely gone." He laughed, "You stole their science. For an experiment?" 

Sherlock's smile faltered, then came back with a flaring heat. "Sort of."

Before John could comprehend Sherlock's words, the detective spritzed some pink-ish liquid into the air between them.

"Sher..." John growled, pupils going wide.

Sherlock pinned John's arms to the bed, knees on both sides of John's hips. He leaned in, right next to the tuft of blonde wrapping around John's ear.

"My turn, doctor." He whispered, voice low.

John tried to arch up to find some friction, but all he found were Sherlock's teeth on the shell of his ear.

"Shit." John rasped.

Then the chemical scent really hit. Not being able to help himself, John arched up again, twisting his hips between Sherlock's knees. The detective in question took this opportunity to undo John's shirt buttons and pull it off of him.

"If you don't calm down, John, I will leave you chained up in the room with nothing but yourself and your erection. Unable to touch anything."

Sherlock moved his hands from John's sides to press down on the front of his hips.

"No one to take care of you."

As he said this, Sherlock's head was tilting slowly back and forth, watching John's reactions.

"Oh, fuuuck." 

John pushed his head back into the mattress, fighting to keep his body still. 

"Do whatever you want, Sherlock just do it now. Fuck."

John took a deep breath in. Sherlock hated to be bossed around and he knew it. And John knew that the detective would pick up on his tactics. Of course he would. But Sherlock had expected this and stopped rolling his hands on John's hip bones, moving down the doctor's body.

"I will do whatever _I_ want, and _you'll_ have to wait for it."

Biting his lip, John completely stilled, eyes closed. He almost broke it by trying to wiggle as Sherlock unzipped his trousers. He almost broke it again by trying to writhe as Sherlock took his dick inside his wet, very warm mouth. John's jaw tensed. Sherlock hummed around his dick, impressed that he'd stayed still so far. And, determined to make John slip up, he suddenly took John's entire cock inside his mouth in one go. 

"Oh my- _shiiit_ -" 

John's eyes flew open. His hands gripped the grey comforter. But still he hardly moved. Not Sherlock, though. Sherlock was bobbing up and down, twisting John's dick in such a controlled, thought-through manner. It was like he'd studied John, watching to see how he reacted to touch. Listening to John in the other room when he'd needed some release. And of course, he had. Sherlock was very interested in his energetic, strange counterpart. And now, he was very interested in the small gasps the man was making, trying very hard to not move.

The detective pulled off with a pop, licking his lips. "Finish off."

He slid backwards off of the bed, kneeling on the floor, motioning to himself. It took John a second to realize that this was his permission move. And throat-fuck Sherlock. John's smile went wide and he scooted to the end of the bed and allowed Sherlock to get re-positioned. 

Then he started to thrust.

////

John had been waiting for this for a long time. He'd told himself all his life that he only liked girls, but that had all changed upon meeting Sherlock. Sure, he was arrogant, erratic, and had a powerful brother who was probably listening to them bang at this very moment. But upon meeting him, it had all clicked into place. John liked both guys and girls. But right now all he wanted was Sherlock. Or more specifically, for Sherlock to be done prepping.

"God, please. I'm ready."

John's ass was in the air, propped up by a folded pillow. Sherlock had about four fingers inside of him, pistoning in and out, slick with lubricant. 

"I want this done corr-"

John flipped his torso around. "So help me I will push you down and use you, myself."

Sherlock somehow made taking his fingers out of John's hole look sarcastic, holding his hand up to show he was done. John didn't care. He just turned back around and stuck his ass out as far as he could. And he waited. For thirty seconds, John waited. Then he turned back around to see Sherlock licking his fingers, watching John with hooded eyes. 

"You're so beautiful like this."

The thin, tall man moved forward, grasping John's sides, massaging his fingers into the smaller man's flesh. John arched his back up into the massage.

"Oh, fuck."

"Indeed."

Sherlock whispered into his ear before pushing himself all the way in. John let out a shout that turned into a moan that the neighbors were sure to have heard. The front desk clerk must be blushing, right now. The detective gave a couple small, testing thrusts with his hips before pulling out and then tugging John back by the curled bend at his hips as he pushed forward.

Sherlock began to push in and out, changing his speed. First grabbing John by the hips, then holding him back by the shoulders. He then slowed just long enough to move the pillow and flip John around so that he could see the doctor's red, flushed face. 

"I like it when you take control." John smiled, pulling Sherlock's warm body across his. 

They shared a kiss. They shared a kiss. John moaned deeply into Sherlock's lips, wrapping his arms around the detective's lithe back. Sherlock's hips began to rock with a sweet laziness, taking his time to push deep inside and pull slowly out. John pulled out of their kiss and smiled.

"Finish off."

Sherlock smiled at his reference from before. He lifted one of John's legs onto his shoulder and held the other in the crook of his elbow and began to thrust. Now John was certain the neighbors could hear the bed pounding against the wall with new-found vigor. John tried to hide his sighs and moans with his hand, the other one pumping on his dick, but Sherlock leaned in and swatted his hand away.

"I want to hear you scream, John. It doesn't work if you hide it."

Then the little shit went faster, lifting John's legs higher to get a deeper angle.

"Oh- hah- fuck!"

That was perhaps a bit too loud, but the other guests could leave their complaints at the front desk, thank you. John's fingernails clawed at Sherlock's thighs just as the detective's pace began to slow and stutter. Sherlock's pants were getting deeper, letting out small grunts of his own.

"John-" Sherlock warned.

"Fucking _do it_."

From his lower back, on, John was completely suspended in the air, one leg dangling down Sherlock's back. He knew they were both close and John was not going to have him pull him off just to come somewhere else. Sherlock was not going anywhere and that was final.

It was warmer than he expected. John couldn't really feel the ropes of fluid build inside of him, but it was very warm. Sherlock collapsed forward, arms on either side of John's head. He tried to move but John grabbed his hips. 

"No. I want to stay like this for a minute." 

Sherlock huffed a small laugh, but complied, shuffling down to spoon John, cock still buried inside.

"Do you think Myc-"

"Finish that sentence and we're never doing this again."

John smiled and snuggled back into Sherlock's chest.

And he could've sworn that as he was falling asleep he heard a mechanized voice say from near the door, "He's smart to have guessed it. And you better thank me for the room, little brother."

**Author's Note:**

> Stopped it here for the sole purpose of making another title pun


End file.
